Most of us were raised to believe that a man is defined by what he’s chasing: the money, the woman, the title, the next goal. And for a big part of life, that’s exactly right. You should be hungry, and you should be building. But what happens when you get there? When the goal is hit, the purpose fulfills itself, and you’re left standing there asking, “Now what?” A lot of men mistake that moment for depression. My guest today says it might actually be a doorway.
David Deida wrote The Way of the Superior Man nearly 30 years ago, and it’s shaped a generation of men, including me. His new book, The Man of Zero, picks up where that one left off. We talk about the difference between living from lack and living from fullness, why surrendering to God isn’t weakness but a code bigger than you, how a warrior can do hard things with an open heart, and why the less you chase woman and world, the more they come to you. This one goes deep, gentlemen. Let’s get into it.
David Deida is one of the most influential and provocative teachers on masculinity, intimacy, and spiritual growth of the past three decades. His eleven books, including the international bestseller The Way of the Superior Man, Dear Lover, The Enlightened Sex Manual, and his newest, The Man of Zero: A Guide to Primal Power, Boundless Sex, and the Freedom Beyond Ambition, have been published in more than 35 languages. He has been named to Watkins’ Spiritual 100 List of the world’s most spiritually influential living people for more than fifteen years.
Before writing for a general audience, Deida worked as a researcher in psychobiology, neuroscience, and evolutionary psychology. He taught and conducted research at UC San Diego’s School of Medicine, UC Santa Cruz, San Jose State, Boston’s Lexington Institute, and the École Polytechnique in Paris, and he was a founding member of the Integral Institute. He has practiced yoga, tai chi, and meditation since 1975. He rarely gives interviews, and he offers his books and audio teachings free, chapter by chapter, at deida.info.
Gentlemen, in today’s conversation David talked about living from fullness instead of lack. But you don’t get there alone, and you don’t get there by reading about it. You get there by doing the work, week in and week out, with men who will call you on your crap and stand beside you when it gets hard.
That’s what the Iron Council is. It’s our brotherhood of men who refuse to drift. You’ll be placed on a Battle Team with other men who are serious about getting better. You’ll build a Battle Plan for your health, your relationships, your work, and your legacy, and you’ll be held accountable to it. No fluff and no hype, just real men doing real work.
We only open the doors a few times a year, and right now they’re open. But they close Friday, October 31st, and when they do, they stay closed until the next enrollment at the end of the year. If you’ve been on the fence, this is your sign. Go to www.orderofman.com/ironcouncil to sign up and join us. I’ll see you inside.
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